Review: Machete

Leave your brain at home, sit back, and enjoy the ride



That's the attitude you have to have going into Robert Rodriguez's 'Machete', which is based on his faux-trailer from 'Grindhouse.'

When we first meet Machete (Danny Trejo) he's being betrayed by his boss and ends up watching his wife get murdered by a drug kingpin, Torrez. (Steven Seagal) We fast forward three years. Machete is in the US, and is hired to assassinate a senator, and get's set up..again. Now he's pissed and is going after all those who have wronged him. He enlists help from Sartana,(Jessica Alba) an Immigrations officer. And Luz, (Michelle Rodriguez) a Resistance fighter who helps illegal immigrants cross the border and find better lives.

Now this movie has it's obvious flaws in the acting department. Alba proves once again that she has limited range, and Lindsay Lohan shows up briefly to play herself. But that doesn't matter because the film is so outrageous. It's completely over the top and self aware and it works perfectly. It's hilarious, probably the second funniest film I've seen all year. It doesn't wait either, literally 2 minutes (if that) into the film there's heads being chopped off and blood everywhere. Machete literally rope swings with some one's intestines at one point. It's got a lot of sex, swearing, and violence and it shot with the same grainy style that 'Grindhouse' had. Trejo is awesome as Machete, he doesn't have a whole lot of dialogue, but his actions definitely speak louder than his words. Steven Seagal is a total badass, and Robert DeNiro makes his Senator character extremely unlikeable. There's lots of Rodriguez regulars in the film too. His twin nieces make an appearance. They were the "Crazy Babysitter Twins" in 'Grindhouse'. The funniest thing to me was the little boy from 'Spykids' (Daryl Sabara) making an appearance as a wannabe Mexican gangster. That provided for one of the funniest exchanges in the entire film.

Bottom line: It's funny and gruesome and makes for a great popcorn flick. Even cringe-worthy performances from Alba and Lohan can't hurt it's credibility. It's just plain fun.

Recommended: Yes

Grade: B+

Memorable Quote: "Machete don't text!" - Machete (Danny Trejo)

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