My Entry for The Greater Good Blogathon

Univarn over at A Life in Equinox had a wonderful idea:

"Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to forever alter the course of cinema as we know it. You have the opportunity to wipe one film from the history books entirely. Our unique time-blending technology has created a wormhole through which you can simply delete the existence of any film ever made. However, you should not underestimate the sheer power that comes along with such a decision. Even the tiniest of ripples could mutate our understanding of cinema as we know it. So, what will you do? What careers will you make or break in the process? The time for your decision is at hand."

 

I've seen a lot of movies that I wish have never happened. The problem I kept running into was either 1) They were based off of a book, so wiping them wouldn't really help because the book would still be around. (Old Yeller) 2) They were so little with completely unknowns that I didn't see much of cinema being altered at all. (House of the Dead) 3) Where would all those wonderful bad movie lists be without them? (Read: Showgirls, Teen Wolves and Astro Zombies) So I decided to pick a movie that most people enjoyed, but one that I think would greatly benefit cinema today if it didn't exist.


The Movie I Destroyed: Avatar

My Intended Outcome: 1) 3D Cinema would not be as popular. I solely blame Avatar for the reason so many movies are made in 3D. If this film had not grossed billions of dollars for 3D tickets, other film makers and studios wouldn't feel it is necessary add on to their features. It would be limited to strictly animated films and maybe a few campy horror movies.

2) Director/douche James Cameron would get off his high horse. This man now has the two highest grossing movies of all time under his belt and he's not going to let anyone forget it. He called himself "The King of the World" when he won an Oscar for Titanic and openly bitches about other films being inferior to Avatar. He says movies like Piranha 3D give 3D a bad name. Actually, that movie probably used it better than 90% of the other ones that are released. And most of that had to do with a flying penis. He insinuates that Kathryn Bigelow deserves her Best Director Oscar not for the fact that she's the best, but because he already has a few. This guy's ego is seemingly never ending. 

3) Had this film with the world's most generic plot line never been made, we wouldn't have to suffer for the two more installments that are already in pre-production. Avatar under water? Oh the possibilities! Who's plot will you steal now? The Little Mermaid? Journey to Atlantis?

The Actual Result: Hopefully my intended outcome would actually happen, but a few other things would be:

1) No awkwardness in the Best Director category at the 2010 Oscars. That would be a shame, I found it pretty amusing.

2) Sam Worthington's career may not have taken off like it did. Personally, I like his smaller indie films like Somersault far more than his big name action ones. He has something special, but now he feels generic.

3) Zoe Saldana's career might be different. Sure, she had Star Trek before she had Avatar, so maybe she would still be where she is today. She had five films released in 2010 alone. I don't see the appeal for her.

4) The people on the Avatar Forums thread: "Ways to cope with the depression of the dream of Pandora being intangible." Wouldn't have a place to express their feelings and share their depression of Pandora not being real. See what I mean?



2 comments:

  1. Nice post, this was a really fun blogathon. I personally liked Avatar but it might be worth eliminating it just to get all of these 3D films out of the theaters. Although anything that would hurt Sam Worthington's career is a problem as far as I'm concerned.

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  2. I really like your post. I really like the movie Avatar. The special affects and story both are fantastic. The direction of the movie is fabulous. I really enjoyed watching it in 3D. This is a must watch movie.

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