Rambling TV: Game of Thrones recap + other TV thoughts


The Watchers on the Wall promised the most intense battle sequence Game of Thrones has seen since Blackwater, and it certainly delivered on that aspect. The episode itself was fantastic, it just ended far too soon, and without the grand ending I hoped for. It's a shame. As always, click those gifs to be redirected to their makers. 

We start off the episode with Sam trying to pressure Jon into telling him what sex is like. Jon didn't say it was like warm apple pie. He sends Sam off, who heads to the library, because that's all Sam can think of. Maester Aemon joins him, and basically tells him that get got some V before he took his vows. 

The wildlings are camped right outside of Castle Black. Ygritte reminds everyone that if anyone tries to kill Jon Snow, she will kill them first. Gilly and baby Sam sneak past them and show up at the gates. Sam yells at Pyp to "open the fucking gates" earning him the line of the night. Sam hides Gilly in a cellar to keep her safe, but not before kissing her.

Then, Mance lights his massive fire beyond the wall, and the battle begins. 


So many things happened. Thorne stopped being a massive douche for once, quasi admitted to Jon that he should've sealed the gates, then went down to the courtyard to kick some ass. Slynt, when left in command atop the wall chickened out and went to hide in the cellar with Gilly. Jon, commanded his brothers in his place. 

A giant shot a massive arrow from the ground, through someone at the top of the wall, who then fell and impaled himself on the other side. That was fucking awesome, oh my God. 

There was a great long tracking shot that showed everyone fighting in the courtyard before Sam releases Ghost to rip some throats. Poor Pyp and Grenn fell on the battlefield, despite them both being alive in the novels. 

The lead Thenn smashes Jon's face in an anvil, only for Jon to spit his blood back in his face and go all hammer time on him. Then he sees Ygritte, but she hesitates and can't kill him again. This leaves time for Ollie (the young boy who's father Ygritte killed) to put an arrow through her chest. She dies in Jon's arms and mentions they probably shouldn't have left that cave.

Everyone that was sad about not getting the chain in the Blackwater episode got a new chain that knocked several wildlings off the wall. A Mammoth stomped on some people, then got set on fire. Basically, a lot of shit went down. Now let's talk about the ending.

At this point, I wasn't paying attention to the time, so when the episode ended with Jon walking through the gates, about to treat with Mance, I was shocked. We only made it 2/3 through the battle, and the glorious ending is now going to be jammed into the finale with a bunch of other glorious things. I'm sure it will be worth it when we DO see it happening, but it should've been an episode ender, and we know this season will not end with The Wall. It just won't. It's a fucking shame. 

The preview for episode 10 is a little infuriating because of this. There's a shot of Dany who we really don't need to see, her story is wrapped for season 4. There's Jaime and Cersei kissing, we don't need that either. Basically, I'm worried that the major events that are going to happen aren't going to be given the time they deserve. Plus, some awesome web sleuths pointed out, it looks like it's Brienne The Hound is about to fight, and that is just so much wtf.

Best One-liners from Veep
"You do me better than I do me." - "You do yourself a lot"
"I do not want you on top of me"
"I get nose bleeds when I'm anxious!"
"I don't have friends in DC. They all call me dicks behind my back. Like, right behind my back so I can hear them."
"I was bulimic for the entire year, and I didn't even lose any weight!"
"I'm so happy it's ME!"
"I'm the President, I can fuck anyone I want to now, right?"



11 comments:

  1. Selena and Gary laughing in the bathroom is the best thing ever. And my favourite line of probably the whole season was "Siri, why does God allow suffering?" Too good :')

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    1. That was a great one too! Veep always has the best one liners, it's hard to narrow them down.

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  2. I can't with that ep. The fuck was that. That ending would be weak for premiere, mid-season but episode 9?

    This was supposed to be my Helm's Deep dammmit.

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    1. It was! I'm sorry you didn't get that :( I hope they make it wonderful next week.

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  3. Veep was great last night. 2 episodes for the price of one and wow... what a way to end the show. President Selina Meyers. Fucking squeaky shoes. I highly anticipate the next season though I doubt it will top this one as I had a blast watching it.

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    1. Veep keeps getting better for me (and apparently everyone else because their ratings went up this season) I'm looking forward to what next season holds. The squeaky shoes was hilarious, poor Gary. lol

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  4. I love how you compare it to the books.. I haven't read the books in a long time and have forgotten a lot of what happens in them.

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    1. It's so hard not to compare them, so thank you!

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  5. I think one of the biggest issue the show has is pacing. The show puts so many unnecessary scenes throughout the season and then they get to the end and...oops, we don't have the time, let's bump it to next season. Cycle begins again, more unnecessary scenes, rinse, repeat.

    They allow the characters to drive the storyline, instead of the storyline. "Hello folks," George Martin gave you guys a great storyline to follow.

    Like how many scenes did we need in the brothel this year...or in any of the years past. I don't think Martin spent nearly as much time in the brothel as these perverted show writers do.

    There are so many other scenes this year that didn't move the storyline along one inch. I feel like that's the main problem. The show's writers are focused on the wrong things, like giving each character enough screen time. It seems to be more important than the actual story.

    I really would have liked to see more Mance this episode. It would have been good to know his motivations. I feel like a scene with Mance would have been much more beneficial than angsty Ygritte promising to kill Jon Snow. We already knew she was going to try to kill him. She put three arrows in him for goodness sake.

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    1. Great comment, I think characters driving the story can be a good thing, because sometimes that get sacrificed to move the plot forward, and characters do dumb or out of character things as a result.

      But you're absolutely right, there were a lot of "filler" scenes this year. The thing is, I'm okay with most filler on this show because all the characters are interesting, and if they're interesting, I don't mind seeing them. That being said, there could've been more Mance for sure, and like Sati pointed out in her review, the first 15 minutes of this episode should've occurred in episode 7, that way we could actually FINISH the battle of The Wall in one ep, and let the triumphant ending stand on it's own.

      I'm wondering if Cirian Hands has something to do with the amount of Mance we're seeing? I got the feeling that the show runners really wanted to push him last year, but we haven't seen him since.

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  6. "and basically tells him that get got some V before he took his vows" - hahahahaha.

    I feel you, I haven't read the books but I felt like the ending lacked a proper punch, even if I really loved the episode all the way through. I do have to admit that I'm very excited for the finale now, though, and I pray to god that they'll keep all of the great stuff in the books in it.

    Also, I really love your GoT recaps! Don't know if I've said it already, but I really do!

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