Expectations vs Reality
all vampires have dry, teased hair. meanwhile Yelchin does his best Rory Culkin impression
I had really high expectations for this film the minute I saw it was in production. Tom Hiddleston, Tilda Swinton, Mia Wasikowska, Anton Yelchin? Sold. I expected it to be fascinating and sexy but by the time I actually got my hands on it, I found nothing really happens in this film at all.
Adam (Hiddleston) is an old vampire living in Detroit. He's a text book emo who makes music, but doesn't want it to get "too mainstream." He hates his life, refers to humans as "Zombies" and contemplates suicide. His wife, Eve (Swinton) who has been living in Tangiers pays him a visit to liven up his mood. According to most summaries of this film I've read, all is going well until Eve's little sister Ava (Wasikowska) shows up and disrupts everything.
I point that out because I thought it was going to be a big part of the movie, when in reality, Ava is part of the story for roughly 10 minutes. She shows up, is a pain in the ass and leaves. Then Adam carries on being emo and Eve carries on trying to put up with it. The film just wasn't that interesting. It didn't even have the decency to give us a Adam and Eve sex scene. Instead, we just have these characters drifting by. The film shows hints of promise, but never actually follows through with any of them.
Memorable Quote: "What do you expect, he's a musician?" - Eve (Tilda Swinton)