Rambling Film

I miss Game of Thrones I don't even want to include True Blood gifs in my post this week. I'm too annoyed. We open with a wet dream Jason is having about Eric. He drank his blood last season, and we all know what that means. As much as I love watching two hot guys like Kwanten and Skarsgard make out, this dream went on way too long and gave off the impression that they're trying to cram as much sex as possible into this final season. At the church, Sookie mentions they should try to identify the dead girl she saw in the woods last night to see where she's from. Maybe that's where the vamps came from. I love how no one is phased by the fact that Sookie just left some dead random in the woods. Lettie Mae visits Layafette looking for V so she can see Tara again. Lala shuts that shit down, so later in the episode, Lettie purposely burns herself so Willa will give her blood. She then sees Tara up on a cross, speaking in tongues. This story has "Ifrit&qu

This month at the always wonderful French Toast Sunday, Paul Thomas Anderson is the director in the spotlight. I've decided to rank the films of his I've seen. 1) There Will Be Blood My favorite PTA film includes stellar performances by Daniel Day-Lewis and Paul Dano. There's just so much to admire here. The film is wordless for the first 15+ minutes, the score is tense, you never quite know when Daniel Plainview is going to lose his shit, but you know it's going to happen. The ending was so shocking to me that I literally just sat there with my mouth hanging open for awhile. 2) The Master It was tough choosing which one I liked better between The Master and Boogie Nights, but I went with the former because I found the story itself a bit more interesting. Plus, Philip Seymour Hoffman ruled this movie, and I sorely miss him. 3) Boogie Nights This might have one of the best (and most outrageous) endings in movie history: Dirk Diggler giving himself a pep tal

Who wants to be part of the family business? 17 year old J (James Frecheville) witnesses his mother die of a heroin overdose. The only family he has to turn to are the ones his mother has been sheltering him from for years. He goes to stay with his grand mother, Janine aka Smurf. (Jacki Weaver) She has three sons, Pope, (Ben Mendelsohn) Craig, (Sullivan Stapleton) and Darren (Luke Ford) Pope and Darren are robbers and Craig deals drugs. A serious of events puts J in the middle of all of this. He's torn between being loyal to a family and assisting a detective (Guy Pearce) who's trying to bring them down. I've wanted to see this ever since Jacki Weaver got nominated for a Best Supporting Actress Oscar for the film. (We she 100% deserved by the way, she was fantastic) I've just never gotten a chance until now. It was definitely worth the wait for me. I love Australian movies in general because they have the sexiest accents I've ever heard, but that detail a

And you thought your life was weird. Henry (Gattlin Griffith) is somewhat torn between his divorced parents, Adele (Kate Winslet) and Gerald. (Clark Gregg) He chooses to live with his mother, who is suffering from a deep depression. One day at the grocery store, Henry offered a wounded man, Frank (Josh Brolin) a ride. He talks is way into their house, and it turns out he's an escaped convict. But his presence there changes Adele and Henry in ways they were not expecting. Jason Reitman is a director that I have high expectations of. He's turned out great movies over the past few years, but I suppose directors have to falter sometime, and this film is easily Reitman's worst. It's not to say it's completely horrible. Winslet, Griffith and Brolin all give great performances, and the story itself is pretty interesting, it's just plagued with a few choices I didn't care for. The film frequently jumps into flashbacks of Brolin and Winslet's character

It's True Blood's finale season. Interviews with the show runners state they wanted to make this season about their cast, and not introduce another character as a threat. I really like that gesture, but that's not the feeling I was getting last night. Let's hope it changes. True Blood is a show that started so strong and has been awful for the past 2 seasons. I hope this one can be better. As always, click those gifs to be redirected to their makers. We start the season immediately where we left off last year. Sam and Bill are hosing a mixer at Merlotte's Bellefleur's for a humans to feed non hep V infected vampires, and for said vampires to protect them from the Hep V crazy vamps. Then they are attacked. Holly, Arlene, Sam's pregnant girlfriend who I still don't give a fuck about, and a few other familiar faces are carried off. Tara starts to fight a vampire that's trying to eat her mother. When we cut back to them, we see Lettie Mae covered

Well, this is confusing. Water Lilies (aka Naissance des pieuvres) follows two 15 year old synchronized swimmers in France as they try to navigate their confusing adolescence. On one hand, we have Marie (Pauline Acquart, a mini Scarlett Johansson) and Anne. (Louise Blanchere) Marie is painfully shy, and finds herself attracted to Floriane, (Adele Haenel) the captain of their swim team. Anne is more adventurous, but she's overweight and sets her sights on losing her virginity to a popular boy. This is one of my favorite foreign language films. I still remember the first time I watched it. I was bored, it was on IFC, the synopsis didn't seem that intriguing at first, but I was immediately pulled into it. The acting is top notch, I don't know a lot about French cinema, but I imagine these three girls will have long careers in it. The last shot of this film is absolutely beautiful too. I think it's one of my all time favorites. Grade: A Memorable Quote: &qu

What I knew going in: Alex and Josh love this film. There was one scene I instantly recognized.  This is my first Ingmar Bergman movie. My Bergy cherry is broken, I'm so proud. *tear* I have about 5 other movies of his in my Netflix queue, and two more on my Blind Spot, but that one is reserved for December. Alma (Bibi Andersson) is a nurse who's been charged with looking after Elizabet (Liv Ullman) an actress who has stopped speaking. She seems perfectly healthy, so Alma takes her to a colleague's summer house to get away from it all. Alma pours her heart out to Elizabet, who doesn't respond, just listens. Eventually, the lines get blurred.  Wow. What the fuck? I feel like I have a million different theories about what I have just seen, but in a way, do any of them matter? Is there really a right or wrong here? Bergman just wanted to mess with people, right? The only things I'm sure of are that Andersson gave one of the best performances I've ever s

Just do the exact same thing you did last time. 22 Jump Street is about as subtle as an earthquake when it comes to comparing itself to 21 Jump Street. It pokes fun at itself several times, both with saying sequels fail, that they need to do the exact same thing, that their budget is bigger. Clearly, the filmmakers wanted us to really know that this sequel was made because fuck you, that's why. $$$$$$$$$$ Schmidt (Jonah Hill) and Jenko (Channing Tatum) are back undercover again. They've moved across the street to 22 Jump street, and are now going to college to track down the dealer and supplier of a new drug. Just like last time. I have to say, the end credits in this movie are genius. I'm a little torn on this film. The reason the original was so funny to me was because I had zero expectations and it turned out being hilarious. This one, while having some extremely hilarious parts (Ice Cube's reaction to a major plot point, and Channing Tatum laughing at

I try not to be a book purist when it comes to my favorites being adapted to film. I tried not to roll my eyes at all the changes they made to Harry Potter. I sat patiently while they shortened a tv interview in We Need To Talk About Kevin. When it comes to Game of Thrones, I expect changes. Especially now that we're getting into book 4-5. However there are some things I can't let go of, because I think they help the story for the better. I had three problems with The Children , but I'm going to try not to turn this into a gigantic bitch fest. (but at this point, I'm a professional hater so it's probably going to happen anyways) But I liked most of the episode, I swear. The Wall: Jon head out to treat with Mance, whom we haven't seen since early season 3. They chat, Mance talks about how the giant they killed came from an old family. "Grenn came from a farm" Jon deadpans. They toast to Ygritte, and to their lost, and Mance lays down his te

Dracarys.   How to Train Your Dragon is one of my favorite animated films of all time. That score, the shots of the dragons flying, I just loved it. I raged when Toy Story 3 won the Best Animated Oscar over it. Now we're back for its sequel, and honestly, it's just as good.  It's been 5 years since we last saw Hiccup (Jay Baruchel) he's still riding Toothless, and exploring the world. His father, Stoick (Gerard Butler) wants him to become the chief of Berk so he can retire, but Hiccup doesn't want that. He's still with Astrid (America Ferrara, who kind of got on my nerves this time around) and she's been racing dragons with their other friends. Hiccup runs across some dragon catchers, led by Eret (Kit Harington) who are helping build a dragon army for the mysterious Drago. (Djimon Hounsou) He's going to wage war. In the process of trying to stop this, Hiccup also runs across his long lost mother, Valka. (Cate Blanchett) John Powell is back with

What I find when I don't take IMDb seriously. This is a remake of a German film, and until very a few weeks ago, despite it starring one of my favorite actresses, I had never heard of it. When I found it browsing through Netflix, I immediately threw it in my queue. Then I looked on IMDb, everyone's favorite movie website/cesspool of a forum to see what the general consensus was. It turns out a lot dismissed this movie as "just another film that lampoons mental illness." Well, it's not that... Jay (Scott Speedman) is currently on probation working as a janitor in a mental health hospital. He comes from a very wealthy family, and the first time we meet him, we see him trying to recruit a date to his brother's wedding, and failing miserably. Enter Daisy (Evan Rachel Wood) a newly admitted patient who's mother raised her in nearly total isolation. She's extremely naive, and decides to follow Jay out of the hospital. He lets her tag along. JK Sim

Historic people that seem nice are probably douchebags. Okay, so that's a broad statement, but if this movie is accurate (and honestly I'm too lazy to check) then Charles Dickens was a class A douche for what he did to his wife. The Invisible Woman tells the story of Dickens (Ralph Fiennes, also the director) and the affair that he had with young Nelly (Felicity Jones) in the 1850's. He wants to keep her a secret for obvious reasons, which is shocking because early on the in film he fails miserably at this when his wife accidentally receives jewelry meant for Nelly AND HE MAKES HER GIVE IT TO NELLY HERSELF. Nelly's not exactly the most sympathetic character either, she still lies to her husband about her relationship with Dickens and many more things on top of that. To put into context how boring this movie is, I watched this movie while running on my treadmill, and it nearly put me to sleep. Running on my treadmill! Who wants to pass out mid work out?

Hate watching. Plenty do it. Personally, I hate watch True Blood and The Walking Dead like it's nobody's business. One of the most annoying questions in any fandom is "why do you still watch the show if you hate it?" There's a variety of reasons why people hate watch: 1) Because they've already invested so much time into it, they need to see it through. 2) Because it used to be great (True Blood) and we hope they recapture that greatness. 3) It has potential to be so much better. (The Walking Dead) 4) Addiction. 5) Because fuck you, that's why. I hate watch True Blood because the first few seasons were awesome, I care about some the characters, and I NEED to see how it ends. I hate watch The Walking Dead because while it's never been a great show, it's mostly been entertaining until this last season, I care about some of the characters, and I need to see it resolve the mess that was season 4. I hate watched Rescue Me during it

The Watchers on the Wall promised the most intense battle sequence Game of Thrones has seen since Blackwater , and it certainly delivered on that aspect. The episode itself was fantastic, it just ended far too soon, and without the grand ending I hoped for. It's a shame. As always, click those gifs to be redirected to their makers.  We start off the episode with Sam trying to pressure Jon into telling him what sex is like. Jon didn't say it was like warm apple pie. He sends Sam off, who heads to the library, because that's all Sam can think of. Maester Aemon joins him, and basically tells him that get got some V before he took his vows.  The wildlings are camped right outside of Castle Black. Ygritte reminds everyone that if anyone tries to kill Jon Snow, she will kill them first. Gilly and baby Sam sneak past them and show up at the gates. Sam yells at Pyp to "open the fucking gates" earning him the line of the night. Sam hides Gilly in a cellar to keep h

Bastøy Boys Based on a true story, King of Devils Island is about a reform type institution for boys called Bastoy. It's on a secluded Island off the coast of Norway. The year is 1915 and Erling (Benjamin Helstad, the Norse Kyle Gallner) is sent to Bastoy instead of going to jail. Once he gets there, he's assigned the new moniker "C19." Bastø y is run by The Governor (Stellan Skarsgard) and Erling is put under the charge of a fellow boy, Olav (Trond Nilssen) aka C1 who is to show him the rules. They soon find out about some of the awful things the authority figures are doing here. I've had this in my Netflix queue forever, and it was due to come off instant stream, so I quickly jumped on it. Now I'm wondering why I put it of for so long, it was brilliant. The film itself reminded me a lot of Doubt . It's bleak, gloomy, grey, there's little to no color and it fits the mood perfectly. The acting is phenomenal. Of course Skarsgard is good

I know you... This retelling of one of my favorite Disney movies ever starts with a young Maleficent. (Issobelle Malloy as a teen, Angelina Jolie as an adult) She's nothing like the one we already know. She's kind, sweet, and has beautiful wings. She meets a boy named Stefan (Michael Higgins as a teen, Sharlto Copley as an adult) they grow to be friends, she falls in love with him, his ambition to be king outweighs his feelings for his friend, so he drugs her and cuts off her wings to secure that. This act of betrayal turns Maleficent into the evil being we know her as. Like Sleeping Beauty, she curses Stefan's daughter Aurora (Elle Fanning) to prick her finger and fall asleep on her 16th birthday. Aurora is supposed to be cared for by three fairies, but they suck at their job to put it lightly. Maleficent is the one that ends up quasi raising her and bonding with her. I fell asleep while watching Snow White and the Huntsman, the other "dark" Disney ver

It's been two days, has the shock worn off yet? I don't think I'm ever going to lose that visual of Oberyn. It's one thing reading about it, but actually seeing it played out in front of you...*shudders* I've decided to split my recap of The Mountain and the Viper up by locations, it's just a bit easier. As always, click those gifs to be redirected to their makers. Molestown Typical brothel shenanigans ensues, Gilly is getting picked on by a whore, but she's not having any of it. Then the wildlings attack. Gilly hides with little Sam, Ygritte finds her and spares her, reminding us that not all wildlings are total assholes.  Castle Black Big Sam is sad over the attack on Molestown because he sent Gilly there, his friends assure him that Gilly has survived so much, that she probably got out a live. Poor Sam. Jon was all melancholy as usual. He should probably learn how to make explosives or something. They're going to need them when Mance attacks.