Oh, The Golden Globes. You are at times predictable in your love of star power over substance and other times, completely fucking out of nowhere like you were tonight. Seriously, I did a terrible job with my picks. No one was working as hard as the censor guy tonight though, I swear he had to do it once every 3rd speech. Ricky Gervais, who is normally very hit and miss for me was an absolute hit tonight as a host. He gave zero fucks. There was also some great presenting duos like Mark Wahlberg with Will Ferrell and America Ferrera with Eva Longoria. And some not so great ones like Amy Schumer with Jennifer Lawrence and Jamie Alexander with Amber Heard. Here is a list of the nominees again. (I swear I'm going to do my predictions earlier next year, my last three posts are all awards season stuff) The winners are in blue, my thoughts are in green. I went
Mozart in the Jungle
Orange Is the New Black
I started off wrong tonight, (and continued with this streak) I have no idea what Mozart in the Jungle is, and apparently it's on its 2nd season.
Best Actress in a TV Series - Comedy
Rachel Bloom- Crazy Ex Girlfriend
Jamie Lee Curtis- Scream Queens
Lily Tomlin - Grace and Frankie
Julia Louis-Dreyfus - Veep
Gina Rodriquez - Jane the Virgin
I should've known to go with Bloom, as the first time nominee in a new show, but I thought Gina would repeat. I should've known better. I have no idea what this show is either. Apparently it's on the CW.
Best Actor in a TV Series - Comedy
Aziz Ansari - Master of None
Gael García Bernal - Mozart in the Jungle
Rob Lowe - The Grinder
Patrick Stewart - Blunt Talk
Jeffrey Tambor - Transparent
I thought Tambor had it. I love Gael though, so I'm happy for him. Even though they censored him during his speech for some reason. Seriously, why? It didn't seem like he was up there going "FUCK YEAH!" over and over.
Best TV Limited Series/Motion Picture
American Horror Story: Hotel
Flesh and Bone
Fucking Wolf Hall... Actually I haven't seen it, for all I know it's pretty good. The cast certainly looks it.
Best Actress in a Limited Series/TV Movie
Kirsten Dunst - Fargo
Lady Gaga - American Horror Story: Hotel
Sarah Hay - Flesh and Bone
Felicity Huffman - American Crime
Queen Latifah - Bessie
So I saw this monstrosity from a mile away. But at least it provided me with two hilarious moments while Gaga's star powered ass robbed Kirsten Dunst. The first was Patrick Wilson's "bitch, please." face below, and the gif up top was Gaga bumping into Leo's seat, and THAT look on his face. Even he knew an actual actress should've won. Gaga in AHS reminds me of that one theater geek in high school that tried way too hard in every play.
Best Supporting Actress in a Series, Limited Series or TV Movie
Uzo Aduba - Orange Is the New Black
Joanna Frogatt - Downton Abbey
Regina King - American Crime
Maura Tierney - The Affair
Judith Light - Transparent
I don't watch the Affair, but I liked Maura when she was in Rescue Me. I wish they would've done more for her. I'm surprised Uzo didn't take this.
Best Supporting Actor in a Series, Limited-Series or TV Movie
Alan Cumming - The Good Wife
Damien Lewis - Wolf Hall
Ben Mendelsohn - Bloodline
Tobias Menzies - Outlander
Christian Slater - Mr. Robot
I actually got this one right! I knew Mr. Robot would be a hit tonight.
Best Actor in a Limited Series/TV Movie
Idris Elba - Luther
Oscar Isaac - Show Me a Hero
David Oyelowo - Nightingale
Mark Rylance - Wolf Hall
Patrick Wilson - Fargo
I didn't see Show Me A Hero so I was surprised that Isaac won, but no complaints here.
Best TV Series, Drama
Game of Thrones
I'm so happy for this show. You should really check it out if you haven't yet.
Best Actor in a TV Series, Drama
Jon Hamm - Mad Men
Rami Malek - Mr. Robot
Wagner Moura - Narcos
Bob Odenkirk - Better Call Saul
Liev Schreiber - Ray Donovan
I knew this was going to be the only place Mr. Robot missed, but well done for Jon Hamm. He played such an iconic character, he deserves the Globe on his way out.
Best Actress in a TV Series, Drama
Caitriona Balfe - Outlander
Viola Davis - How to Get Away With Murder
Eva Green - Penny Dreadful
Taraji P. Henson - Empire
Robin Wright - House of Cards
I thought this was Viola's but I'm happy for Henson. Her speech was hilarious, AND she passed out cookies.
Best Motion Picture - Comedy or Musical
The Big Short
Jason Statham in the above gif though. He was the best part of Spy. I'm okay with The Martian's win here. Out of the 5 nominees, it was my favorite and it WAS hilarious. In a perfect world, The Kingsman: Secret Service would be here to win, but apparently the Globes didn't find "If you save the world, we can do it in the asshole" funny.
Best Actress in a Motion Picture - Musical or Comedy
Jennifer Lawrence - Joy
Melissa McCarthy - Spy
Amy Schumer - Trainwreck
Maggie Smith - The Lady in the Van
Lily Tomlin - Grandma
Ugh. Lawrence, I love your work, I do, but I'm over you tonight. You are officially too much. You weren't funny with Schumer and you were a poor sport for having to *gasp* stand next to Katy Perry because she was in the right in that little twit feud with your buddy Taylor Swift.
Best Motion Picture - Drama
Mad Max: Fury Road
What does this do for Spotlight? It seemed the front runner going in. I'm fine with The Revenant winning. I think Spotlight has a broader audience but they are both A+ films for me.
Best Actress in a Motion Picture - Drama
Cate Blanchett - Carol
Brie Larson - Room
Rooney Mara - Carol
Saoirse Ronan - Brooklyn
Alicia Vikander - The Danish Girl
I thought Saoirse had the edge in this two woman competition, but now it seems Brie does. I'm fine either way, both women gave amazing performances in amazing films.
Best Actor in Motion Picture - Drama
Bryan Cranston - Trumbo
Leonardo DiCaprio - The Revenant
Michael Fassbender - Steve Jobs
Eddie Redmayne - The Danish Girl
Will Smith - Concussion
Yay Leo. Everyone stood up for him, even they know he's over due for that eventual Oscar. He gave an excellent speech too.
Best Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture
Jane Fonda - Youth
Jennifer Jason Leigh - The Hateful Eight
Helen Mirren - Trumbo
Alicia Vikander - Ex Machina
Kate Winslet - Steve Jobs
This was a big surprise. I'm not sure if it changes the game in this category though. It might have just been the HFPA wanting her and Leo to have matching globes.
Best Actor in Motion Picture - Musical or Comedy
Christian Bale - The Big Short
Steve Carell - The Big Short
Matt Damon - The Martian
Al Pacino - Danny Collins
Mark Ruffalo - Infinitely Polar Bear
I'm okay with this, even though I would've loved the underrated Ruffalo winning.
Best Supporting Actor in a Motion Picture
Paul Dano - Love & Mercy
Idris Elba - Beasts of No Nation
Michael Shannon - 99 Homes
Sylvester Stallone - Creed
Mark Rylance - Bridge of Spies
I'm bias, I haven't liked Stallone in a thing. Give me Dano or Shannon.
Best Animated Film
The Good Dinosaur
The Peanuts Movie
Shaun the Sheep Movie
Best Screenplay – Motion Picture
The Big Short
The Hateful Eight
This was another surprise, though I really shouldn't be surprised by Sorkin winning anything.
Best Original Score – Motion Picture
The Danish Girl
The Hateful Eight
So Quentin Tarantino got up to accept this award, clearly drunk, and said Ennio Morricone never wins anything despite him winning 2 Globes in the past. Nice.
Best Original Song – Motion Picture
"Love Me Like You Do" - Fifty Shades of Grey
"One Kind of Love" - Love and Mercy
"See You Again" - Furious 7
"Simple Song #3" -Youth
"Writings on the Wall" - Spectre
I can't believe this shit song won.
Best Foreign Language Film
The Brand New Testament - Belgium, France and Luxembourg
The Club - Chile
The Fencer - Estonia
Mustang - Colombia
Son of Saul - Hungary
I finish this post off with a gif of Oscar Isaac and his sexy beard.