Rambling TV: Thoughts on Game of Thrones and "snobby book face."

Yesterday was the season finale of Game of Thrones. Now unless Winds of Winter is released prior to April of 2016, we're all going to be Unsullied for the most part. This season has made quite a few controversial decisions. I've hated plenty, and didn't mind others. I've always tried hard to separate book from show. I know they're different and not everything in the novels can be in the show. But I failed to do that in the finale, and I ended up watching with "snobby book face."

Winterfell - Stannis is apparently the heaviest sleeper in the world because half his army managed to leave before he woke. Then his wife hung herself in grief over the burning of their daughter. Then Melisandre bailed on them. THEN he has to march to Winterfell on foot and take on the Boltons as they're all on horses. THEN after losing said battle (the most underwhelming ever) Brienne shows up out of nowhere and kills him in the name of Renly. Stannis is having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. Thankfully we always have book Stannis.

While all of this is going on, Sansa breaks out of her room with the corkscrew she stole. (Then promptly drops it) She lights a candle in the tower, but Brienne and Pod are too busy fucking off with Stannis to see it. So she runs into Myranda and Theon. Myranda taunts her, and eventually Theon has had enough and shoves her off the side of the wall. Sansa and Theon realize the Bolton army is back after their "battle" and they jump off the wall into a pile of snow. Hopefully they didn't break anything.

Meereen - Daario actually does something right for once, and tells Tyrion to STFU as they discuss what to do after Dany flew off and bailed on them. Tyrion was being a dick to Jorah, so he kind of deserved it. Grey Worm is up and moving, just in time for more romance scenes with Missandei instead of getting Lady Stoneheart and the Manderley's. Varys shows up to beef up Dany's small council (welp, no King's Landing epilogue) 

Dothraki Sea - Drogon just wants to eat and sleep off his injuries instead of flying back. So Dany stupidly walks away from him and gets surrounded by the Dothraki. In the books she was actually WITH Drogon when she sees them, so this scene was all wrong in my head. It woudl've been cooler for them to find the two of them together.

Dorne - In conclusion to the most pointless story line of the season, Ellaria kisses Myrcella on the lips as she leaves. Jaime has a stupid heart to heart with Myrcella about him being her real father. Then she dies. Ellaria kissed her with poison lipstick. Guess they're turning that boat around.

Braavos - In one of the only scenes I liked, Arya disguises herself as the little girl who she convinced to die earlier on and kills Meryn Trant like the creepy bitch he is. Then Jaquen gets after her for stealing a face. She goes blind at the end of the episode, much like she did in the books.

King's Landing - Cersei has to talk her penance walk through King's Landing. Aside from the fact that they thought it was a good idea to CGI Lena Headey's face on a body double, that scene was very well done. Headey was spectacular. She gets to the end, and we see her new Kingsguard, Ser Robert Strong carry her away, just like the books.

Castle Black - Sam and Jon bro out and talk about sex, then Sam gets sent to Oldtown. Davos shows up and is trying to talk Jon into sending aid, however Melisandre comes to tell them Stannis and his entire army are dead. Later, Olly, that little cunt comes into Jon's office to tell him a wilding is talking about knowing his Uncle Benjen (who has been missing since S1) When Jon follows him, it ends up being a trap, and he's stabbed to death by some of the men of the Night's Watch. Ghost is nowhere in sight. For what it's worth, I'm sure Jon won't stay dead. Not with Melisandre there. 

And that concludes a painfully dreadful episode of Game of Thrones. One where I got to see the character assassination of Stannis complete, where they tweaked book scenes so they never reached their full potential. That was brutal and disappointing. 

10 comments:

  1. Everything hurts and everything is darkness :(

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  2. Is this episode the Jump the Shark moment for the series? I haven't seen the show but only bits of it as I heard this one was bad. Plus, I heard Lena Headey did a nude scene but it was CGI nudity. That is horrible.

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    1. Her face was CGI'd on a body double because she was pregnant. I'm not sure if this would be considered a "jump the shark" moment because I think the only people that are pissed are book readers. The general audience never seems to be attached to Stannis.

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  3. I didn't read this because I should be starting Thrones next week or something like that and I don't want to know about this Stannis shit yet...but...no new Duggars news!?!?!

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    1. LOL. I could do a weekly thing just making fun of the Duggars. I'll include them next week. I needed to rant about Game of Thrones assassinating one of my favorite characters.

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  4. I read this post because I am done with avoiding spoilers. I'm this close to being done with the show. :-/ Great recap, Brittani.

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    1. I've been watching way too long to quit, but I am very unhappy at the moment. Thanks! :)

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  5. Great recap! I am joyful about not having read the books because I'm liking the show more and more. I didn't notice Lena Headey's CGI-d head at all! Also, this is my favourite sentence I've read in this blog: 'Sam and Jon bro out and talk about sex'. T'was truly brosome.

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    1. lol. I couldn't think of a better way to describe it.

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No seriously, post one. I need attention.