DVD Review: Virgin Territory

I've literally followed the production of this movie since early 2007 when it begin filming. It started off as "The Decameron: Angels and Virgins". Sounds dramatic right? Then It changed to simply "The Decameron". Then "Angels and Virgins" Then apparently the people marketing the film realized they weren't trying to sell a period piece and moved on too "Guilty Pleasures", then "Chasing Temptation" and finally landing on the questionable choice of "Virgin Territory."

I came across this film whilst browsing Mischa Barton's film creds. I was (key word) one of the few people that actually remembered the talent she had in earlier films such as "Lawn Dogs" and "Skipped Parts" and was a little depressed to see how it was being wasted on 'The O.C" When I first read the synopsis of this film: "Young Florentines regale one another on the Italian country side while the black plague decimates their city." I was expecting to see a medieval drama. After viewing this I'm not quite sure what I just saw.

It sounded promising, Hayden Christensen, Tim Roth and Matthew Rhys all star, but I can't help but feel like this film didn't meet it's original expectations.

There are many stories to keep up with in "Virgin Territory." Gerbino (Tim Roth) is on the hunt for Lorenzo (Hayden Christensen). He stays at a convent and pretends to be deaf and dumb so that the Nuns will *ahem* act very un-nunly around him. A joke that's only half way funny the first time it's used and becomes ridiculously tired towards the end of the film. Barton is Pampinea, who is a popular virgin set to marry a foreigner that she does not love. She's thrown into a love triangle with Gerbino and Lorenzo.

It doesn't help that they don't give us enough back story (or time) to care about any of the characters. The film comes off as campy, the dialogue is horrible, and Mischa..as much as I really really wanted to like your acting, I can't. I'll give "You and I" a shot, but if that's a letdown..I'm done. I can only defend for so long.

Apparently overseas they are marketing this film as a medieval "American Pie" type film. Sure the over hyped sex is there, but not the fun, humor, or charm that "American Pie" had. I laughed out loud once in the entire movie, and it was more at how ridiculous the situation was then the actual dialogue.

More of a rant then a review, but please take my word for it. This film is not what I thought it would be. It's trash.

Recommended: No 1.5/5 stars (and that 1/2 is for Hayden's near perfect English accent..that's it)

Memorable Quote: "Perhaps you could even start in the middle!" - Elissa (Kate Groombridge)


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